Posttraumatic growth is not about returning to or recreating the life you had before trauma; rather, it describes the perspective shifts and choices for positive change that often come in the aftermath of significant trauma. Being steeped in the field of resilience myself, the field of posttraumatic growth overlaps and explores not only what helps people get through life’s difficulties, but what helps them thrive as a result of challenge.
Trauma can be simply described as an experience that overwhelms our capacity to cope, so it is no surprise that much of trauma work involves calling in supports that increase one’s capacity to cope with the stress of the trauma. Whether or not we have these aspects of life in place prior to trauma, they can help us to recover, make meaning, and create positive experiences that, while not changing the traumatic situation, give a sense of meaning and purpose to life as it continues on.
Here are five aspects of posttraumatic growth to reflect on:
What helps you to feel strong and to access resources within yourself? How do you cope with pain, both emotional and physical? There are many ways of dealing with sensations and emotions that feel uncomfortable, and many of us seek out behaviors that have drawbacks—using substances, overworking, or distracting from the pain rather than moving through it. What can you do to help you connect to yourself in a healthy way and process uncomfortable emotions?
Many find strength in sports, exercise, creative endeavors (music, art, theater), or in connecting with and helping others. Take some time to reflect on what could serve you best in this way.
With trauma often comes an organic shift in perspective. Perhaps things that used to be meaningful no longer carry your interest, while other topics feel suddenly more compelling. Take a moment to reflect on what you may want to leave behind and what is pulling your attention moving forward.
Often with trauma, people experience a shift and reprioritization of values; if this has happened for you, what new possibilities exist? How can you shift how you spend your time and energy to reflect these changes?
Social supports are a huge way that we move through difficulty. Trauma may be what leads us to reach out for professional help, or to confide in a friend. We may also have a deeper sense of compassion for others who are suffering, leading us to relate to the world in an entirely new way.
Take a moment to look at your relationships—with family, friends, your community, and society at large. Where do you feel connected, seen, and supported? These are places that can be helpful and healing. If you do not feel you have people who support you, now is a wonderful time to reach out.
Trauma brings us face to face with our mortality and, as such, can lead us to appreciate and even treasure moments of peace or connection we may have taken for granted.
I think Hamilton Jordan describes this best in his book No Such Thing as a Bad Day (2000): “After my first cancer, even the smallest joys in life took on new meaning—watching a beautiful sunset, a hug from my child, a laugh with Dorothy. That feeling has not diminished with time. After my second and third cancers, the simple joys of life are everywhere and are boundless, as I cherish my family and friends and contemplate the rest of my life, a life I certainly do not take for granted.”
Trauma brings us face to face with our mortality and, as such, can lead us to appreciate and even treasure moments of peace or connection we may have taken for granted.
Many trauma survivors report a shift in relating to the spiritual world.
The diagnostic (DSM) definition of trauma explains that many traumatic experiences involve exposure to death or threatened death, which brings to the forefront questions of mortality, afterlife, and spiritual meaning. We may find ourselves asking, “Why did this happen to me?” or “What has become of the person who passed?” These questions and the answers we seek are deeply personal and have significant implications for how we understand ourselves and the world. Allow time for these reflections in the aftermath of trauma.
As Ernest Hemingway so eloquently pointed out, “The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places.” Posttraumatic growth points to those places that become strong through exposure and experience. It may not be a painless process, but seeking opportunities for growth can help create a deeper sense of love, connection, and meaning in our lives.
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